Develop a High-performing Team With Coaching Skills

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Coaching Skills For Managers - As a manager, you are constantly being called upon to help your team members develop and hone their skills. While you may be comfortable providing mentoring, guidance and direction, you may not feel as confident when it comes to coaching.  You may not even be sure what the difference between mentoring and coaching is. They are very different, and also complementary and essential tools for the best leaders to create high performing teams.

It took me a long time as a manager to understand the difference between coaching and mentoring. Mentoring came naturally as I gained experience in my UX and leadership roles. Coaching – with an emphasis on listening, and patience – took more awareness and practice. Once I started more mindfully bringing a coaching practice in my teams, the results were fast, and powerful. Coaching can be used to build trust with your team, to improve performance, motivation, collaboration, and to catch potential issues before they develop.

Coaching differs from mentoring in that it encourages the individual to identify and develop their own solutions as opposed to giving advice and guidance. Coaching is more of a collaborative process. Mentoring, on the other hand, focuses on providing guidance and advice based on the mentor’s experience, to someone with less experience in that area. 

In my work as a UX leadership coach, the need for developing coaching skills comes up with my clients on a regular basis. It’s so important, I include it as a module in my Strategic UX Leaders™ development program. Because it can create such powerful results, I want to share some tips with you so you can feel more comfortable coaching your team and become a more effective manager right now.

1. Get into a learner mindset

Effective coaching requires a learner mindset. As the manager, you may think you're supposed to have all the answers, but that mindset can be a trap, and can keep you from really understanding the situation. Avoid being judgmental, and remember that their perspectives and experiences are equally valid. In fact, since the goal here is for their development, their perspective is what matters most.

2. Ask open-ended questions

Avoid asking closed-ended questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no. Instead, opt for open-ended questions that begin with "What" or "how". These types of questions help to encourage your team members to think creatively and to come up with their own ideas.  This will give you a better understanding of the situation and help you come up with more creative solutions.

3. Avoid questions starting with "why"

Questions that begin with “why” put us on the defensive. We feel the need to come up with an answer, and a satisfactory one at that, especially when asked by someone in a position above us. It implies that the person asking the question knows better than us, without saying so. In a coaching conversation, it’s usually better to rephrase a “why” question to start with “what” or “how.” So for example, instead of “why did you make that decision?” you might ask “what led you to that decision,” or even “how did you come to that decision?”.  

4. Listen to learn (be curious)

This tip about listening, in itself, is a great leadership skill. Listen to learn what the other person's perspective, vs. listening to see if you agree or if you have an answer. This means being curious and really trying to understand what your team member is saying and feeling, listening for any nuances that you can observe to build insight. Resist the urge to offer solutions and instead just focus on listening, and asking prompting questions.

5. Give guidance without suggestions

We’re all used to giving suggestions, and it is most people’s first instinct when a person talks about any issue they may be having. But suggesting solutions will shut down the coaching process, and turn it into a conversation of directives. It reduces the ability of the other person to create connections and insights that lead to the best solution for them. 

I remember a conversation with a manager I had about how to navigate a stressful situation with a stakeholder once, and they suggested that I try meditation as a way of managing the stress. Although their suggestion was well-intentioned (in fact I’m a big proponent of meditation!), it wasn’t helpful at the time as it didn’t actually address the actual problem. In this case, the suggestion made me feel like they either didn’t understand the complexity of my problem, or they believed they knew what was best for me - neither of which is particularly empowering. 

It’s important to remember that coaching is about empowering the person and helping them come up with their own solutions. Instead of jumping into giving a suggestion, ask them questions and allow them the space to figure out what works best for them. Listen carefully, stay focused on the conversation, and remain non-judgemental so they feel comfortable enough to uncover the more non-obvious aspects of what they are dealing with. Giving this type of guidance can help create an environment where self-discovery and learning can take place.

6. Turning Feedback into a coaching moment 

You can utilize coaching methods in many situations. Utilizing coaching feedback means asking people to give themselves feedback instead of, or before, giving your own. It applies both to positive feedback and ‘improvement’ feedback. Coaching feedback is a great way to foster personal growth and reflection.

When giving coaching feedback, it’s important to begin by emphasizing strengths and recognizing the person’s effort. Be sure to frame any improvement areas in a positive way and offer support on how they can achieve success. Provide examples or specific details to give clarity to the feedback, but do so in a positive and encouraging manner. Finally, make sure that the person knows that they have control over their progress; ask questions such as What action do you think you should take next? which will empower them to create solutions. Coaching feedback is an effective tool when done correctly, and it can help foster growth in both individuals and teams.

More coaching development resources

I hope you’ve found these tips helpful. Coaching is an evergreen leadership skill that you can keep developing your entire career, and there are many resources available to dive deeper.

If you're looking to strengthen your coaching skills, I have a workshop that will give you the foundational tools as well as learning the GROW coaching framework you can use to create transformational coaching with your own teams. Regardless of how much, or little, coaching experience you’ve had, this 3 hour workshop will help you level up in this essential leadership skill. Learn more about the workshop here.

I also offer a 7-week UX Leadership development program called Strategic UX Leader,™ which includes coaching & mentoring skills as part of the curriculum. You can find out more about that at StrategicUXLeader.com.